If I told you that lying was good for your relationship would you believe me?
Trust me. I’m telling the truth!
Sure, we’ve all been told that 100% honesty is the best foundation for happy and healthy relationships. And for the most part, that’s dead-on.
But what if I told you that telling the truth has the potential to create unnecessary conflict, breed insecurity, and humiliate or hurt your partner’s feelings?
Hmmm. That probably explains why couples lie to each other an average of three times a week. Researchers call it “deceptive affection,” because it comes from a place of deep love and caring. In fact, most agree that telling little white lies for the right reasons can actually strengthen your bond.
1.“Thank you so much for the gift, it’s just what I wanted!”
Even if you hate it from the bottom of your heart, the gesture is what counts!
2.When he asks about your exes
Curiosity pertaining to your previous relationships is normal. But does he really need to know that you once dated a professional athlete or that your most recent ex-boyfriend was great in the sack? It’s fine to drop a name or two, briefly mention the span of time you dated and a quick explanation for the break up (with an emphasis on the latter). However, divulging too many details can conjure up comparisons and lead to feelings of jealousy, insecurity and inadequacy. So, even if it’s not entirely true, quickly change the subject by saying exactly what he’s longing to hear, “why are we even talking about this, babe? You know you’re the best I’ve ever had!”
3.“Tell me the truth, I won’t get angry.”
Chances are he will say something that’ll make you want to shout and scream at the top of your lungs. But resist the urge to do that. Plus, this way you’ll at least find out the truth! And once you’ve heard him out calmly, you might also respond more rationally.
4. When you seriously dislike his friends
Unless his pals are outright rude or try to hit on you, dissing them can come across as insulting or even make your guy feel pressured to “choose sides.” These are his buds and he’s not likely to dump them. Besides, chances are, you have a few gal pals that drive him nuts too. So, to keep the peace, squelch your true feelings. And if you can’t stand his friends, spend more time with yours!
5. “Its just a girl’s night out.”
Some nights you just don’t want to be a couple. And maybe you secretly miss your single life, and going out with the girls just reminds you what that used to be like.
6. When your most recent sexual encounter was just meh
In long-term relationships, lovemaking is sometimes just so-so. That’s normal. Mind-blowing sex doesn’t happen every time you jump in the sack. But that doesn’t mean you need to comment, “Wow, you were a bit off your game tonight, huh?” Better to snuggle up close and tell him how much you love him. Then, next time, guide his hand to your hot spots and tell him how much he’s turning you on. That’s bound to boost his confidence to the point that he makes your toes curl. No lie!
7.“Your sister is joining us? That’s great, she’s so much fun!”
Well, hanging out with a 15-year-old might not be the fun night you were planning, but hey, it’s sweet to say so – and a gesture he will appreciate.
8. When you have a secret (but harmless) crush
There’s nothing wrong with checking out other guys when you’re in a committed relationship.Who doesn’t? And don’t think for a nanosecond that your S.O. isn’t checking out other women. But your man doesn’t need to hear about your hot new co-worker with the six-pack abs. Your crush will pass and your relationship will be stronger because you didn’t go for total honesty and avoided making your guy jealous over nothing. So, zip it! Or, if you must, gush to your girlfriends.
9. “I understand, I’m not in any rush to get married either.”
Even though you’re about to burst into tears any moment.
10.“Are you mad? I wasn’t at all uncomfortable! I mean, you guys used to date ages ago!”
After you meet his ex and have never struggled harder to be nice and polite to someone.
11.“My ex? I don’t even know if he lives in this city any more!”
Truth be told, you stalk his profile every now and again on Facebook. But it really is pretty harmless. It doesn’t hurt to comfort yourself with the knowledge that you are, in fact, better off without him.
12.“I think your aunt is the sweetest.”
In the parallel universe perhaps, but why not make an effort? Nobody is asking you to go and hug her!
13. “Oh! It’s fine. I’m OK”
Guards on guys! You must know that she’s not fine at all and nothing is OK. And sooner or later you will have to bear the burnt of her pent up emotions that she has somehow managed to hold back until now. You’ll find her taking this emotional defense on occasions when you may have forgotten her birthday, taken her for granted or have done anything that hurts her.
14.“I KNOW she’s just your friend, I like her!! Why would I have a problem with her?”
Even though you don’t trust that b****, you need to trust him!
15.You stare, I don’t care!
Either you are too lucky to have the coolest woman by your side, or you are getting an inflated ego without any reason if you believe her on this. No matter how hard she tries to look cool and composed, but the fact remains that no woman loves it when her man ogles at another woman. “After all, who wants to feel like second best? And the ‘I don’t care attitude’ is usually to hide the vulnerability and a pretence. Most women hate their man staring at another woman,” confesses Radhika Khattar, a Delhi-based housewife.
16.“Bachelor party? Of course you should go, I trust you.”
And then blackmail his best friend into giving you all the details, if you must.